I often talk about asking a good question. This morning a tarot student asked how to be sure you are asking a good question (one that addresses what you really need to know) when reading for herself.
The principle is the same but here are some examples to help you along when you are emotionally invested in the answer. Emotionally invested is a desire to either validate a suspicion, or to deny it. The cards cannot fix your life or relationship, they give you information to use that can improve your life. If you make that your intention, you will get great information every time.
If you are seeking information about suspecting a cheating husband/wife, it doesn’t work well to ask the cards if they are cheating. Firstly, the cards do not do yes or no answers. If that is what you seek, it is best to see a clairvoyant/aura reader. Often yes or no queries lead to confused readings, this is made worse if you try to lay out a number of cards with a yes or no intention.
If your partner has prior history in stepping out this will also impact the accuracy of your question because the chances are good you know pretty well what their behaviour means or, you simply don’t trust them. It is also a terrible idea to ask about other people or a person who you think may be involved. Once you ask a question that begins with a mistaken assumption, every card you lay out has no meaning. It is very important to keep the boundaries that restrict the presentation of information as wide as possible to start, then narrow the field of query as you go.
The first card will become a significator card from which all others can follow. This is called an evolving layout. Practicing this is pretty easy, you can start here for any query on any day. For example you can start with the main influence in your day, this is usually an influence that holds a major part of energy, that is to say a single event that sets the tone or ends the day, or it can be a number of things that are determined by attitude. Then you can follow that with clarification of how this will come into effect.
An evolving layout looks something like this:
- ‘What do I need to know to clarify my current situation with [insert name]’ If not a person you can just think of the situation.
- What options do I have?
- What can I do to improve the situation?
- What is the best outcome I can hope for?
The cards you lay out for each question may influence the next question. What restricts or causes problems is not accepting information, but if done correctly this layout can present a story where you hold the power over your own choices and where you direct things to go. They can cut through denials, and give you the best case scenario. If that means the end of the relationship and your partner is cheating, it is where, on some level, you understand you are headed.
The key to using information is to give yourself the best chance to plan ahead and work a situation to your advantage. If your partner is going to exit the relationship, you will always do better by accepting this and planning for it, legally or otherwise. If your partner is not planning on exiting the relationship but continues to be dishonest or engage in extra marital affairs, you may wish to exit the relationship of your own accord so you can heal and move on rather than putting years of pain into false hope.